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Archive for August, 2013

Bismillah

I was reading today about temperament types and personality types etc. I found it fascinating mashaAllah. I plan inshallah on revisiting the page to get a better understanding of myself and those I interact with in order to improve myself inshallah.

Now then, as for the Hijra mashaAllah… We are still not in our own home yet and two months plus in someone else’s home is truly wearing thin everyone’s nerves, waAllahu ‘alim inshallah and may Allah forgive us everything ameen.

The other day I was talking to my sister who lives in Oman mashaAllah and we were playing catch-up and updates with each other. I’m so glad she has settled in so much mashaAllah compared to two years ago when she moved there and everything was new and different. I hope my case will be the same in that two years  from now, I will look back and see a more settled me inshallah. Stronger, smarter, wiser, and more patient inshallah.

As I might have mentioned previously, I’m living with my MIL and our relationship has grown in various ways. MashaAllah she has (my opinion/perception) realized that I do have my strengths mashaAllah, some comparable to hers and some different from hers mashaAllah. I also have come to understand her a bit I think, and draw my own conclusions separate from DH’s opinion/breakdown of the situationJ

She is a very strong person mashaAllah, with set ways of doing things, a program for everything, and firm opinions about reality. That is not to say she is inflexible or incapable of growing or achieving a new understanding of a situation. In some way, I hope to be like her in the way she is with her kids, especially her daughters, mashaAllah. They are close and talk every day, usually a few times a day mashaAllah. Her kids come to visit her very regularly and rely on her and do exchanges with her and generally have a very friendly relationship with her. I see this and I’m so impressed mashaAllah.

Living with her, I am able to observe and understand the dynamic of her relationship with DH (her son) and appreciate the differences that are natural between DH and I mashaAllah. I also get to learn to appreciate my own mother in a whole new light mashaAllahJ Most importantly, I’m slowly learning, learning what is natural for mothers across the board and what is personal choice of the woman involved. I hope my stint here will help me to become a better, stronger, and more understanding person inshallah.

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ramadhan2013-image3

Bismillah

I was writing to my friend and ended up mentioning a few things relating to Ramadhan and Hijra. As I haven’t written in a while over here, I thought I’d just upload that update instead of waiting for the perfect time which may never come.

well, ramadhan was good mashalllah… Allah blessed me to fast all of it so i have no make ups and i’m so happy about that mashallah… then i got to fast 5 of shawwal and have to wait for the last one till after inshallah

it wasn’t the ramadhan i had imagined or planned due to circumstances but it was good in unexpected ways mashalllah:)

i learned more about my weaknesses and my dependency upon Allah so alhamdulillah

i also learned more about the algerian ramadhan culture and even found some things i m sure to grow to love inshallah.

i also got to see more family dynamics and attained certainty of the perfection of Allah’s love and provision for us humans subhanallah, from the families he gifts us with, to the friends, the neighbors and the countries even… i got to reflect and realize how wonderful the gift of my family has been to me, all of them, with all their wacky stuff, all the bad,the good and the ugly subhallah… i can now say i love them from the purest of places in my heart… and i’m so thankful to Allah for them. each individual has taught me lessons about the world, about humanity, about people in general, about forgiveness and understanding, about prejudice and how to over come it, about jealousy and how to avoid it, about envy and pride and how to circumvent it, about Allah and how to be a more humble and obedient servant to Him… if not for them… i don’t think i could survive Algeria (or any place really). this ramadhan has been instrumental to me realizing this with a certainty mashallah and i’m so thankful to Allah for the gift of insight…

though it wasn’t the place, the situation, nor the intention that i had, this ramadhan has proven to be an open door to growth in areas i had not envisioned at the beginning of it… and i can only thank Allah.

as the for hijra portion… we are both still determined but having to adjust the rosy vision… not that it was a very rosy vision to start with but we had some things we thought were set in stone but it turns out they were written on beach sand and the tide came and washed them away with amazing and unexpected speed 😀 lol

so we are adjusting our perimeters, figuring out new things, and working out a new way more or less blind mashallah..

dh is learning he is not superman and i’m learning that i must be a stronger partner/not so silent partner in our endeavors… dh likes to be superman mashallah and i usually let him but i think in Algeria that model isnt going to work… our hope as usual is in Allah with His Perfect Attributes/Names inshallah… knowing and worshiping and relying on Him gives us hope and the strength to keep trying mashallah alhamdulillah

 there are also some amazing people here that we hope to learn from inshallah… some are exPat like us and some are born and bred mashallah and all of them are lights in a sometimes dark forest as we navigate mashallah… and all is from the Rahma of Allah sis… the good to give us hope, and the not so good to increase our reliance upon Allah subhanahu…

i look forward to hearing from everyone… no one has called me… in my phone, only dh ever calls me… its lonely sometimes…

the kids are doing good mashallah… they miss their friends and still talk about them loads mashallah:)

ps… in case anyone ever wonders… hijra is where it is… its not easy but by Allah when u even think for 5 seconds about it, its worth it… and another thing… there is no way to plan as everyone will encounters the obstacles that Allah wants them to in order to bring them closer to Allah but, one can prepare in as many areas as possible… from living expenses to high eman… just know that hijra like hajj is filled with trials and requires patience and pure intentions…may Allah help us and accept from us inshallah ameen”

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